Nick Griffin Applies for EU Funding

SPEAKER: Welcome back everyone. And I see some new faces here today. Okay, first order of business is EU Funding Applications, and the first applicant is Mr Griffin of the British National Party. GRIFFIN: Thank you, Mr Speaker. We'd like to launch an advertising campaign for our Voluntary Repatriation Scheme. You can see we've already made a mock-up of our first poster. On the left here is an ethnic family looking unhappy on a rainy British Monday. The copy reads 'are you fed up with Britain's unfair PC council housing schemes, sponging immigrants, and racist politicians?'. Then over on the right of the poster, the same family is in the sun, with friends, smiling, and the copy reads 'isn't it time you went home?'. It's all very wholesome. SPEAKER: Right. Are there any questions from the floor? MAINSTREAM MEP: Yes, I've noticed that in your 'ethnic family', the mother is Indian, the father is African, and two of the children are very obviously Chinese. Is that what you think 'ethnic families' look like? GRIFFIN: No, of course not. There is a good reason for that, and it should be clearer from our second poster. What we've done, to avoid offending anyone, is to invent a fictional country for this campaign. Bear in mind this is a work in progress, but you can see here that the same family is seen on a plane, enjoying a drink, and the strap-line above says 'Why Don't You Go Back To Darkistan?' ’” that's the name of our country ’” and in smaller letters at the bottom, so as not to alienate anyone, it says 'or wherever it is that you people come from'. MAINSTREAM MEP: I would worry that that still might offend someone. GRIFFIN: You think people might see it as racist. MAINSTREAM MEP: That is a concern, yes. GRIFFIN: Can I remind you that I have been democratically elected to this Parliament by 1.4% of the British electorate? SPEAKER: And how much do you think this will cost? GRIFFIN: We're applying for two million Euros, but obviously we'd prefer it in pounds.